Cancer is one of the most, if not the most, emotionally driven signs in the zodiac. Ruled by the lunar cycles, Cancer’s moods wax and wane with the moon. Cancer has a deep emotional core in which he or she lives.
Cancers have uncanny instincts that are often spot on. However, because their perceptions are so colored by emotions, it’s difficult for them to be objective, especially in matters of the heart.
Because they are always acutely aware of their own emotional sensitivity, most crabs form a protective hard shell around their true selves.
EMOTIONS AND VALUES
Rest assured that the saying, “Romantics are the new rebels” was coined by a Cancer somewhere down the line. Usually, only another Cancer (or perhaps a Scorpio) can empathize with just how deep Cancer’s feelings run.
That’s why you’ll hear so many Cancer/Cancer gush about how they fell in love at first sight, regaling even strangers with the heartwarming details of their wedding – right down to the ornate details of the antique China set passed down from one of their grandmothers.
Yes, Cancers seem to have created romantic cliches. But for two Cancers who are in love, the cliches are all true.
COMPATIBILITY RATING: 10 OUT OF 10
Though moodier than most friendships, bonds between Cancers are built on a solid foundation of emotional empathy. We live in a world where detachment from emotions is viewed as power, and our society is unconsciously engaged in a battle between mind and heart. In such a world, where Cancerians have learned to hide their emotional cores in hard shells, meeting another crab can be a transformative experience.
Nurturing Cancers are natural caretakers and loyal friends, especially to one another. When one of them is upset, the other goes out of his/her way to understand her friend’s pain and comfort her. This relationship can even be somewhat symbiotic, with one person sensing the other’s needs and feelings and knowing exactly what to do.
Although there are many wonderful things about this kind of relationship, it does hold the dangerous potential to become exclusive, precluding anyone else from entering their private, emotionally driven world.
Also, if one crab is more wounded than the other, the first crab might monopolize all of the second’s time and energy. Essentially, such a Cancer is still a child at heart; he has not yet learned to become an independent adult who stands on his own two feet.
If this type of pattern emerges in a friendship (or romantic relationship) between two Cancers, the stronger one needs to set strong boundaries, and the second needs to respect them. If they don’t, the friendship might need to end, at least for a while, until their maturity levels are more compatible.
Crabs have an instinctive, almost primal understanding of one another. They are both empaths. One Cancer not only senses her Cancerian partner’s feelings, but absorbs them into her own emotional core. Two such emotional people may sometimes have trouble knowing where one begins and the other ends. Their love for each other is complete. There is little or no restraint once they both get past their natural mistrust and fall for each other.
However, because both crabs are so steeped in emotions most of the time, this relationship does not easily lend itself to balance. They could indeed get stuck in a rut if they’re unable to solve the problems that arise between them with logic. This could also be the case if one or both partners has an emotionally wounded inner child.
As we all know, children who were not nurtured enough in youth have difficulty growing into healthy, independent adults. This is especially true for sensitive Cancers. Crabs tend to live in the past and base the dynamics of future relationships entirely on family history. If these patterns form the structure of a relationship between two crabs, emotional empathy could rapidly develop into codependency.
When both Cancers are emotionally healthy enough, their understanding is strong enough for them to tolerate it when their moods go out of sync. If you picture the way a real crab moves sideways toward its destination, sometimes drawing backward just before ambushing the object of its desire, you’ll have a clearer picture of how Cancerian moods and self-expression work.
It’s easy for one partner in this relationship to grow sullen if his low mood goes seemingly unnoticed by his partner. If he were an Aries, he wouldn’t be able to resist the impulse to demand why his partner isn’t paying attention. Cancers, however, don’t express themselves directly; they’re more likely to sulk and be manipulative, storing old hurts in mental files to be used later.
Still, when a Cancer loves, it’s usually for life. Even if these two do encounter problems they can’t overcome and split up, they will typically always love each other deeply as people (though perhaps not as friends, or at least not for a long while.)
Cancers don’t take the end of a valued relationship any easier than Taureans do. Their sensitive souls don’t have a “reset” button; it takes them a long time to feel whole again after a major loss.
If they want to get married, they need to be able to live in harmony with each other’s vacillating moods. One of the best ways to do this is to work on communicating honestly and directly with each other.
For all the needs Cancers harbor inside, they’re notoriously unaccomplished when it comes to getting them fulfilled. This problem will eventually be diminished if they work on communication, making more room for the enormity of their love.
COMPATIBILITY RATING: 8 OUT OF 10
Cancers are usually traditionalists at heart, and the driving force in their lives is emotional security. For this reasons, Cancers who fall in love do tend to get married, and sometimes more quickly than other signs. Typically, if they wait, the issue is money; they may not have enough of it to feel secure.
When two crabs make it to the altar, you can bet that they built the solid foundation of their home on emotional security; that and lots of hard-earned money, as most Cancers need financial security almost as much as emotional security. Their loyalty is unwavering. They are natural born caretakers who pamper each other with more affection than a joyful mother does her newborn child.
As deeply as Cancers feel, their emotions should never be mistaken for weakness. Cancers are both nurturing and strong, which is a potent combination in love. They are also some of the most tenacious people you will ever meet. Keep in mind that this is a cardinal leadership sign. Thus, Cancers go after what they want, even if they come after it sidelong.
Cancers who are insecure might be so wholly focused on getting their own needs met that they neglect the other’s. However, Cancers who are mature and committed to growth use their emotional natures to connect with each other rather than push each other away.
COMPATIBILITY RATING: 8 OUT OF 10
Cancers are creatures of subtlety and nuance who do not tend to express themselves directly unless they’re having a meltdown. They can be evasive and even downright secretive. The moon is a source of illumination; it lights up the vast night sky so that these moon-children might gaze upon the stars together.
But there is also a dark side of the moon, and Cancer has many feelings and moods that even he doesn’t understand. To avoid chaos and massive confusion, crabs almost always need to make conscious efforts to communicate more honestly with each other.
COMMUNICATION: 4 OUT OF 10
SEX AND INTIMACY
To most Cancers, sex is a means to an end: loving and being loved. While their voracious sexual appetites might find them engaging in casual relationships before finding the right partner, most Cancers live their whole lives on a mission to find their other half.
Once they do fall in love, it’s often deeply and forever. Because they are so sentimental, the mood has to be set just right when they make love. The atmosphere needs to be as romantic as a stage set for Romeo and Juliet.
When two Cancers come out of their hard shells, open themselves up, and embrace their loving natures, sex has transformative power for them. Their love melts them to the core. It becomes complete, unconditional, and a bond that could not be broken by time or even death.
When they do get stuck in sexual ruts, it’s usually because they’re unable to assimilate their ever-changing moods into some semblance of harmony.
Sometimes one of them is in the mood for sex and affection; however, the other might be experiencing a low mood and retreats inside himself. Because Cancers of both sexes have an inborn maternal instinct, the first Cancer will probably find out what’s wrong and try to fix it.
If her efforts are to no avail, she will start to pout. She may even perhaps refrain from making her Cancer lover’s favorite Tuesday night dinner the next evening. Cancers love their daily routines, and are as sentimental about them as everything else.
It might sometimes take a while to get back in sync, but healthy communication and sexual self-expression is a saving grace for them. They are more than able to fulfill each other’s mutual need for deep intimacy and emotional connection. As long as there are no obstacles or depression blocking their union, their sexual bond is a deeply contented one.
COMPATIBILITY RATING: 8 OUT OF 10
CANCER/CANCER COMPATIBILITY PROS:
- Cancers are naturally nurturing and strong, a combination that is hard to master.
- Their emotional capacity is matched, so they can experience the love of a lifetime together.
- Both crabs care so much about security, any decisions they make about their relationship are often harmonious for both of them.
CANCER/CANCER COMPATIBILITY CONS:
- Cancers tend to lack balance, making it hard for them to restore each other’s when it goes out of whack.
- Neither of them are very adept at expressing their needs, feelings, and desires directly. Instead, they tend to play games of emotional hide and seek. When they are emotionally manipulative, the result can be very hurtful.
- Cancers have difficulty with boundaries, and their perceptions are often colored by their own emotions. It can be difficult for two Cancers to grow together and as individuals when they are together.
Summary of Cancer and Cancer
Because Cancers are so emotionally sensitive, the stability of this bond depends largely on other important placements in their chart. If their moons are compatible, harmony in this relationship will likely outweigh the conflict caused by misunderstandings.
If their moons or ascendants are not harmonious, there may sometimes be conflict and confusion between them.
Still, because Cancers are loyal and their love runs deeply, they will probably be able to exist together without compromising their all-encompassing need for emotional security.
OVERALL COMPATIBILITY RATING: 8 OUT OF 10